Attitude and Longitude

Goals: “Prepare To Take Detours In Stride”

Do an Internet search on successfully achieving goals, and you’ll come across plenty of wise insights about dealing with obstacles to achieving goals too. That’s because all the great goal achievers in history also had to deal with obstacles or mistakes they made along the way.

James Joyce said, "Mistakes are the portals of discovery."

And he’s right.

Obstacles, mistakes and failures are shifting points for course changes along the journey. Sometimes you have to downshift and look for a new path to reach your goal. How you view or handle the obstacles to your goals has a significant bearing on how easily or quickly you reach your goal.

Still, I have to remind myself of these things on occasion, like when I was especially revved up about a particular goal recently. I kept hitting speed bumps, and my frustration levels kept revving up too.

The goal was conceived in January when my colleague, Tom Cassidy, was visiting Austin (my hometown) from England. We enthusiastically agreed to plan and deliver a series of public workshops together in Austin this coming April. Tom, who is an inspiring big thinker, said, “Let’s pick a venue that can fit 200 people for one of the events.” Swept up in his vision for a large program, I drafted a budget and started to list the likely locations that could host it.

The planning process was humming along pretty well, and then I hit a snag regarding venues. The typical places in Austin that could fit 200 participants kept replying with "that date is not available." Turns out April is peak wedding season… duh!

After spinning my wheels in disappointment after disappointment for a couple of days, I finally decided to reset the goal to allow for a smaller event. It suddenly became a whole lot easier. I found a beautiful classroom-style venue that seats 90 at the AT&T Executive and Education Conference Center on the downtown Austin campus of the University of Texas. And we were able to reserve it for our prime choice date, April 21. Not only is the room well-suited to the seminar that Tom and I will be teaching, the location is centrally located and easy to reach. Additionally, participants can enjoy their lunch break in one of two eateries in the building or go to a variety of restaurants within walking distance. Success! And everything continues to fall into place smoothly and easily.

In one of our email correspondences, Tom reminded me of the “choose easy” rule of goal achieving: “A message I learned a while back is that 'business is not meant to be a struggle - if it is, then you're doing something wrong.' Sure - it's meant to be hard work, but not a struggle - it CAN be fun at every step of the journey.”

That’s true… and, after all, “easy” and “minimum willpower” goal achieving is what we are teaching in our 13x4 programs together.

As I’ve reflected on all of this, I see that our idea to plan a large program was not a mistake after all. In fact, it’s a really good idea… for the long term that is. Plus the original large program idea led to some major breakthroughs in two areas that I hadn’t known about before I hit those obstacles: 1) I realized that I needed to hire a freelance event promoter to assist me for this and future projects and 2) I realized that it’s better for me, at this time, to build toward the success of the big goal by achieving this smaller, interim goal first.

These aha moments all hit me last week, and then, over the weekend, I came across the following. From The Magic of Thinking Big by Dr. David Schwartz, in the chapter entitled “Use Goals to Help You Grow”:

…prepare to take detours in stride. If you are driving down a road and you come to a “road closed” situation, you wouldn’t camp there, nor would you go back home. The road closed simply means you can’t go where you want to go on this road. You’d simply find another road to take you where you want to go.

Okay, I get the message loud and clear. From now on, I’ll prepare to take detours in stride... and I’ll remember to choose “easy” too.

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Angela Loëb helps people rediscover and use their gifts so they bring who they are to what they do in life. To learn more, please visit: www.insyncresources.com
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The Most Adaptable Will Survive

Several years ago, I was having a conversation with my highly-educated sister, who has 3 science degrees, about evolution and survival of species.  Yes, our conversations are often that geeky.  What can I say?  She set me straight about the theory of “survival of the fittest” by proving that the key to survival is not necessarily that the fittest will survive... it's that the most ADAPTABLE will survive.  

She cited a classic example.  During the Industrial Revolution in England the white birch trees near factories often became gray from soot.  There was a species of moth that came in two color varieties, gray-speckled and white.  The white moths had the advantage of survival prior to the industrial revolution era because when they landed on the white birch trees, they were camouflaged to hide from bird predators.  When the trees became gray in color, the gray-speckled moths gained the advantage over the white ones.

The good news is that, unlike moths, we are able to consciously choose how we will adapt.  Yay!  And, in order to adapt, we must not see ourselves as victims of circumstances.  

It pays to choose proactively how we will respond to our circumstances.  Surviving – and thriving – requires that you adapt or you will wither away… and, I mean wither away physically, emotionally and/or spiritually.

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Angela Loëb helps people rediscover and use their gifts so they bring who they are to what they do in life. To learn more, please visit: www.insyncresources.com
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Book Recommendation: The Bridge Across Forever

A couple of months ago, someone asked me what kind of books like to read.  “All kinds” was my first response.  “Okay,” I thought,” that was a cop out.”  So I amended my answer, “I like all kinds, but I really enjoy autobiographies and biographies that share the person’s growth and their ‘aha’ moments.”  But I wasn’t off the hook yet because this person’s next question was, “What are some that you’ve read?” 

Ever since that conversation, I’ve been reflecting about the particular books I’ve read that influenced me, inspired me and were based on true life experiences.

The Bridge Across Forever was one such book.  Richard Bach has such a way with words and storytelling that he has been my favorite author ever since I read Jonathan Livingston Seagull as a child.  Even when telling his own story, he infuses his writing with a down-to-earth poetic brilliance that I love so much. 

This book is a lovestory.  Bach reveals his quest for and discovery of his soulmate.  I won’t give his story away by telling you about it, but I will leave you with an excerpt that shows his skillfully playful writing style.  You’ll enjoy this book, especially if you’re a romantic at heart.

I felt like a surfer resting on his board, all at once some monster energy wells up, grabs him without asking him if he’s ready and there’s spray flying from the nose of the board, from midships, then from way aft, he’s caught on this massive deep power, the wind pulling a smile around his mouth.

There are excitements indeed, having one’s book read by many people.  One can forget, charging mile-a-minute down the face of a giant wave, that if one isn’t terribly skillful, the next surprise is sometimes called a wipeout.

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Angela Loëb helps people rediscover and use their gifts so they bring who they are to what they do in life. To learn more, please visit: www.insyncresources.com
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Conditions of Love

In human relationships, we all have conditions that we place on the relationships we have with others. By this, I mean that we all have a way in which we measure the love being shown to us by another.  The measurement we use tells us whether we feel it’s genuine and if it’s enough. 

For example, I realize that a condition I use to measure whether I’m being loved is the answer to the question, “Do I feel like my vision plan is being honored and respected?”  

It is fair to expect something in return for what you give because relationships are not meant be lopsided.  No one side of the relationship is more deserving than the other.   

The plane that we live in is a dynamic place of complimentary opposites – positive/negative, male/female, light/dark – and does not allow complete and total unconditional love.  

When we are born into this plane of complimentary opposites, the unconditional becomes conditional.  We are able to grasp being unconditional even as we are being conditional about love.  Just as we are able to grasp the concept of being one, while we are being more than one.  

It’s like light, which is known to quantum physicists as particles and yet also as waves.  

Until we leave this plane, we love conditionally... And yet, we can certainly lessen the hold that our conditions have on us as we become more aware of unconditionality.

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Angela Loëb helps people rediscover and use their gifts so they bring who they are to what they do in life. To learn more, please visit: www.insyncresources.com
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William Kamkwamba Harnesses the Wind And Builds A Future

TED:  At age 14, in poverty and famine, a Malawian boy built a windmill to power his family's home. Now at 22, William Kamkwamba, who speaks at TED, here, for the second time, shares in his own words the moving tale of invention that changed his life.

   

It's a simple message, but powerful and must be said over and over again until we all know this like we know that we need water to survive...

"Trust yourself and believe.  Whatever happens don't give up." - William Kamkwamba

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Angela Loëb helps people rediscover and use their gifts so they bring who they are to what they do in life. To learn more, please visit: www.insyncresources.com
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Buddy Guy Mentors Young Bluesman Quinn Sullivan

Let's have some Friday fun! And why not get a little inspired while we're at it too?

In case you don't know this about me already, let me tell you... I LOVE the blues. Buddy Guy is one of my all time favorite bluesmen, and check out who he's been mentoring. Quinn Sullivan was 10 years old in this feature story from NBC's Today Show (video and link below). This year he turned 12 years old, and, by the way, he's still touring with Buddy Guy. They're doing a show in a Las Vegas next month.

Turn on your speakers and enjoy this delightful story about a young person with big dreams and big talent who's making his mark on the world. (4:38 minutes.)

 

And if you liked that, you might want to just sit back and watch/listen to the gig where Buddy "discovered" Quinn at age 8.

Big smile now ~ tapping my foot ~ enjoying the jam ~ Happy Friday!

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Angela Loëb helps people rediscover and use their gifts so they bring who they are to what they do in life. To learn more, please visit: www.insyncresources.com
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Fitting In At All Costs... What is it really about?

Last night DeAnne Pearson taught us about how to find our core values.  It was a great teleclass, and even though I’ve been doing personal development work for more years than I care to reveal, I had a couple of new breakthroughs about myself. 

Note:  If you’re interested in hearing the program, you can still sign up at www.MindOpeningDialogues.com until February 3, and I’ll be happy to send you information on how to access the recording.

What I found especially compelling was DeAnne’s personal story about her quest to find her own authentic self.  I believe that many of us have bumped into the same sort of “you must conform” scenario while growing up.

In first grade, she had a teacher who would change her life’s course significantly, but possibly not in a way that you think.  

“Did I mention, I love to talk?...” DeAnne asked as she began telling us her story. “I remember spending a lot of time at the teacher’s desk, with some stern words and meetings between my mom and the teacher. So, I stopped talking. I didn’t answer the teacher’s questions, I didn’t even answer for attendance and was counted absent for days at a time in first grade.”

Her name is all one word, DEANNE.  Prior to first grade she had learned to write her name with a capital A in the middle.  But this was a big issue with her teacher who wanted her to change the spelling or have her parents separate it into two words. “No one does that,” the teacher said.  What DeAnne saw as unique was considered wrong by the teacher. 

Another challenge DeAnne faced that year was having trouble with recognizing the alphabet and with reading.  Turns out she had dyslexia. 

When another student asked why she never smiled. DeAnne recalled the teacher’s response, “I have no idea, I just don’t think she is going to make it.” 

So, DeAnne got the message:  It was not okay to do the things she loved, like talking; her uniqueness was not going to be honored; and she was “just not going to make it.”

And that’s when she began to do what she could to fit in at school.  

“By second grade I was getting citizenship awards, excelling in all subjects, graduating in the top 5 of my class with academic scholarships and awards all the way through graduate school where I studied education, and later counseling, all the time fitting into a very traditional and acceptable path of teacher, then school and college counselor. The whole time my stomach hurt and I knew there was something missing.”

Through her work, DeAnne has come to realize she isn’t the only one with a story of “doing whatever it takes to fit in.”  She says that a lot of her clients have been job seekers and people unhappy in their careers who have this common desire to fit in at all cost. 

One of DeAnne’s favorite questions to ask herself and her clients when moving through a life change, is “What it is really about?”

And her conclusion is that, in most cases, it’s about whether you are being authentic to your core values – whether you are being honest with yourself and fulfilling your unique destiny.

DeAnne’s bio contains a line that I think sums it up nicely:  “You are never more brilliant, more beautiful, or stronger, than when you are fulfilling your own unique destiny. It is the only way to live honestly and the only true gift you can give the world.”

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Angela Loëb helps people rediscover and use their gifts so they bring who they are to what they do in life. To learn more, please visit: www.insyncresources.com
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Special Event: Fun, Informative & Free Virtual Program With DeAnne Pearson

When Life/Career Coach, DeAnne Pearson suggested we do a teleclass together, I couldn't resist. She's a ball of fire and a whole lot of fun. Just what we need to get motivated to achieve our new years resolutions!

The teleclass is called "Resolutions Were Made To Be Broken." DeAnne is going to teach us why our resolutions might fail and how it's not about character, discipline or willpower. Her “Values to Vision” program is a full day workshop, but she’s agreed to give a mini course for free during this call.

Learning Outcomes:

• Easily create a personalized filter unique to you so you get what YOU want instead of everything else you don’t.
• Discover your Top 5 Values… these are the “things that make you hum!”
• Boost your energy and increase your focus levels exponentially.
• Learn how to do a “style” search without having to pay for a fancy assessment. (And it’s much more fun!)

Additionally, everyone who signs up will get a Values Compass Chart, and DeAnne will teach us how to use it during the call.

Note: if you can't make it live, sign up anyway so you can hear the recording later.

Live Free Program:
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
7:00pm-8:00pm

Sign up at www.MindOpeningDialogues.com

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Angela Loëb helps people rediscover and use their gifts so they bring who they are to what they do in life. To learn more, please visit: www.insyncresources.com
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